A Shout Out from the Ladies
Ann Job has written a stunning article about women taking back the road, so to speak, thanks to an H3. Here’s how it begins:
“Off-roading isn’t just for men anymore. It’s a great way for women to find adventure, camaraderie, accomplishment and natural beauty.
Why would five women, aged from the 20s to nearly 80, head to the famous Rubicon Trail off-road venue in the summer?
To drive Hummer H3s, of course.”
Now not even female bonding is safe from the pervasive snort of the Hummer.
You can read the rest of the article here.
Posted by humptastic on September 18th, 2006
No Comments | Hummer News
Ronald McHumper McHummer
Following up on McDonald’s decision to perpetuate gender roles and American disregard for the environment by giving away toy Hummers in their Happy Meals for boys, Ronald McHummer offers you the chance to show what McDonald’s is REALLY thinking by making your own McDonald’s sign!
Send us your humping-related signs and we’ll post our favorites.
Posted by hot4H2 on August 18th, 2006
One Comment | Hummer News
Hummer Cologne: ‘The Essence of Adventure’
I thought adventure smells like not washing for weeks at a time and wearing the same clothes day-in, day-out. Guess I didn’t realize that when you’re going for an adventure in your Hummer, you don’t actually have to leave your vehicle.
The Hummer cologne adventure begins with a fresh and exhilarating burst of freshness comprised of green foliage, cardamom, thyme, and peppercorns that capture the essence of the outdoors. These lively notes are then melded with a warm, rugged, masculine, adrenaline rush of leather, patchouli, amber, and sandalwood. The smooth richness of tonka bean act as the “axle” that links and balances the fresh and warm notes, creating an olfactory sensation that can only be Hummer.
Posted by humpmaster on August 15th, 2006
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License to Rampage?
Apparently some Hummer drivers think they drive under their own set of rules…this is what an H2 looks like after 4 (FOUR!!!!) collisions in rapid succession.
Rodney Udd, who owns the Hummer of Alaska dealership in Anchorage, was treated at and released from Providence Alaska Medical Center on Monday after he drove his Hummer through a red light, hit two vehicles and then sped down the road, where he hit two more vehicles, police said. (Photo by Bill Roth / Anchorage Daily News)
Posted by humptronix on August 9th, 2006
One Comment | Hummer News
God to Bless Christians With Hummers During the Apocalypse
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In Left Behind, Tim LaHaye and Jeremy B. Jenkins’ best-selling prophecy-based books about the impending apocalypse, God distributes gas-guzzling planet-polluting SUVs among Christians who have been left behind after the rapture. From Book 8 - The Mark: |
“I think a Humvee is the way to go this time.”
“We got one?”
“Two. Down around the corner near the luxury cars….There’s hardly a car in here with less than half a tank of gas, and most of ‘em are full.”
“People must have been prepared.”
“Some were listening to the rumors of war, apparently.”
Buck…surveyed the selection of vehicles - dozens of them, mostly new - and let out a low whistle. “When God blesses, he blesses….It’s like we’re in a free car dealership and it’s our turn to pick. We’ve got a beautiful baby and a free sitter, and all we have to do is decide what model and color car we want.”
She rested against a white Hummer and Buck joined her….She turned and held him tightly for a long minute, and they kissed fiercely.
Posted by hot4H2 on August 7th, 2006
2 Responses | Hummer News
Get a HUMMER in your Happy Meal
Why is Ronald smiling? Because he has the new HUMMER Happy Meal toys before everyone else.
Starting tomorrow, one of eight toy HUMMERS will be packed in each “boy” Happy Meal (”girl” meals will feature Polly Pocket, so don’t fret if you’ve got a daughter, moms and dads). The full HUMMER lineup is represented, from the now-defunct H1 to the H3T Concept pickup. There’s even an alternative-fuel H2H, whose hydrogen tank glows green when the car is pushed. It also comes with “Hydrogen” decals that can be applied to the bodywork to ensure maximum political correctness.
Read the rest here
Posted by humptastic on August 6th, 2006
One Comment | Hummer News
Texas Sheriff Wastes Money
Evidentialy this Texas Sheriff was tired of those highland criminals getting away. Instead of buying a helicopter he decided to put an extra $80,000 into his Hummer. Unfortunately, no one in the USA could do such insane modifications so he sent it away to Germany. It’s back now and roaming the jungles of Texas. Watch your ass criminals!
In order to lend the flashing red-blue light bar and ear-splitting siren more credence they installed a supercharged V8 engine with an enlarged displacement of 7.0 liters in the engine bay of the Hummer H2.
Read the rest here.
Posted by humpmaster on August 4th, 2006
5 Responses | Hummer News
Dwyane Wade Crowned “King of Bling”
Miami Heat star Dwayne Wade won his most prestigious award to date at GM’s 3rd annual All-Car Showdown recently. Not satisfied with just dominating showdowns on the court, Wade eclipsed his NBA Finals MVP award when he was awarded this year’s “King of Bling”, beating out such bling royalty as Snoop Dog and Ludacris thanks to the “personality and attitude” exuded by his customized Hummer.
Twelve celebrity automotive enthusiasts proudly showcased their GM vehicles, each reflecting its respective owner’s personality and attitude via exterior and interior customization. This year’s “King of Bling” title went to Dwyane Wade for his 2006 white HUMMER H2 SUT.
Read the rest here.
Posted by humpmaster on August 1st, 2006
No Comments | Hummer News
Cher to Auction H2
Come October, the highest bidder can sleep in Cher’s bed. It’s one of 700 items from the superstar’s Malibu home that will be auctioned beginning Oct. 3. The sale includes furniture, artwork, jewelry, a 2003 H2 Hummer and original costumes by Bob Mackie.
Read the Rest Here
Posted by humptastic on August 1st, 2006
No Comments | Hummer News
Hummer Limo Saves the Day
The Dixon Ranch in Doyle, Texas finally has the vehicle it needs. Robert Dixon told me on the phone today that the strech hummer saved his family’s ranch. “We were runnin’ out of room! They don’t make trucks big enough to fit all them cattle anymore.” said Mr. Dixon. Hummer claims that the new modified party hummer limo can hold 20% more cattle than a H1, and 50% more than the Chevy Tahoe. Thats a lot of cattle in my book.
